I am Tired

One of the most common themes I hear in counseling is "I am tired." I can not do this anymore. They explain all they have suffered, how they have tried and how long they have cried. In their brokeness they are looking for the pain to stop. I can emphasize when people get stuck in the quagmire. We all go there from time to time but we don't want to live in that miry muck.

In the book of Acts Peter met a "saint" as he was described. A fellow believer, Aeneas. He had reason to be tired. He had reasons to give up. He was not suffering from a broken relationship. Although his situation must have effected his relationships. He was suffering from a broken body. He had been bedridden eight years and was paralyzed.

Peter said to him, "Aeneas, Jesus the Christ heals you. Arise and make up your bed." He arose immediately. Can you imagine how he felt? With one word or should I say one name, JESUS. Everything changed for him. BUT that was just the start....the spark that started the eternal combustion.

The bible goes on to tell ALL who dwelt in Lydda and Sharon saw him and turned to the Lord.

Men and women who were spiritually dead were made alive and their names were written in the lambs book of life. His life was used to effect eternity.

We unlike Aeneas, are so blessed. For when we are paralyzed in pain or stuck in the quagmire we are not alone. We have the word of God, and a real relationship with Jesus. If we will let the hard places drive us into the arms of Jesus we will find out the most important treasures are found in his love. When you find out he is all you have you will find out he is all you need.

When you take refuge in the Most High God and realize your momentary affliction is really just a moment when compared to eternity. Then it is easier to let patience have her perfect work so lives can be changed for eternity. God will reward your patience. When patience has it's perfect work in you the bible says you will be perfect and complete lacking nothing.

Do not quit doing good, for there is great reward for you and all those who surround you.

Melissa

You inner circle of counselors and friends

Christian people need to together for the purpose of strength and accountability, meeting together in small groups of 2 or more. Finding your support group is imperative. If you can’t find one then start one. If you are isolated, no matter what causes it, i.e. business, hurt, depression the list is endless; you are in a dangerous place.

Find those few people who you want in your inner circle. Blessed is the person who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. Who has your ear? Are they making God and his ways a priority in their life. We become like those we hang out with. God says if you want to be prosperous then delight in reading the word, meditate on in day and night. IF you do this you will yield much fruit, you will not dry up and you will prosper in WHATEVER YOU DO.

For a marriage moment comment: Focus for the wife, nothing can replace good girlfriends. Don't expect your husband to try and fill their shoes. Men while the wife is out with her girlfriends, you go get some "Man" time. Do all your grunting, farting, hunting, watching sports, get let you wild side out. When you feel fullfilled hanging with your "like kind" then go home and be what your mate needs. Men be loving and gentle and women honor, respect and adore your husband.

Melissa

Conditions of the heart

Psalm 28:7

The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out into songs of thanksgiving.

When we can't trust the ones we love because they have betrayed or hurt us it is then we must trust the Lord, remembering that He alone is our strength. When we focus on God, and his word, we are in a safe place. When we feel safe we can keep our heart soft. When our heart is soft we can respond in Godly ways towards others. When our hearts are in fear they self protect and react in hurtful ways to those we are called to love. How is your heart doing today? Is it soft in faith responding in Godly love or hard in fear defending itself, and reacting in destructive ways?

Mimwrite

You had me at hello

This morning when I was doing my quiet time with the Lord I was reading Psalm 11. I read a psalm every day that is in line with the day's date. Ever watch the movie with Tom Cruise, it is called Jerry M something? It is where Tom is a sports recruiter and he has broken up with is wife, and he comes back to her and she is sitting in the middle of a divorce group and he busts into the door? He says, "Hello sorry to interrupt but I have to talk to my wife" and in front of all those ladies he spills his guts over how he knows he needs and wants her in his life. After he finishes, he looks for her response and she says , "You had me at hello". That is how I felt this morning after reading the first line of psalm 11. It says, "In the Lord I put my trust." God had me at "Hello", with the first line of psalm 11 on 11-11-11. .

I got some bad news yesterday, I have a lump on my breast and they have to operate. BUT I put my trust in my God who is able to do miracles. No matter what you are going through today or in this season of your life. Meet God at hello and put your trust in him. He will prove to be faithful!

Blessings,

Melissa

Staying safe and forgiving too

The people who are the closest to you are the ones who can hurt you the most. When that occurs hopefully the guilty partner asks for forgiveness. We are instructed by a loving God to forgive. We are to turn the other cheek. This can get CONFUSING when we still feel like we can be hurt in the same way again. Does forgiveness mean we are to set ourselves up for more abuse? NO.

How do you stay safe and still forgive? We must set boundaries. Someone can say they are sorry, but we are unsure if true repentance will occur. We always hope and believe the best. But we need to be wise.

Many people make the mistake of intrupting God's law of sowing and reaping. The law of sowing and reaping states: We are personally responsible for our own actions and consequences of those actions. If one sows good things like: patience, understanding, and love we will reap healthy relationships. IF one sows revenge, manipulation, dishonesty, selfishness and the such their relationships will be ones of destruction.

The question is how can one forgive if they are in a relationship with someone who is on the destructive track? Most of the time people are clue less on how to let the law of sowing and reaping have it's good work.

First confronting an irresponsible or destructive person does not work to end the behavior. Have you ever heard the statement, "I have talked to them till I am blue in the face?" Have you tried nagging, screaming, and threatening? How about ignoring it and hoping it will go away?

If you are a person who tends to be codependent or boundary-less then you will be someone who repeatedly rescues people from the consequences of their own irresponsibility or destructive behavior. You will not allow them to reap what THEY sow because you step in and reap the consequence for them.

Only consequences of someones behavior causes them enough pain to stop sowing bad seed and turn into a good sower. Note, you should set boundariesto protect yourself not to inflict punishment on others. Let the healthy boundaries and the natural consequences do the work as God intended.

Sometimes maneuvering through setting healthy boundaries is difficult. When you are too close to the Forrest to see the trees, seek help from a professional.

Promise: Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.

I see people in person and do phone, facetime, and skype sessions. I Have clients in 4 states. Call me if I can. My personal cell is 321 277 1058.

Melissa

Are your Resting or Stressing?

Matthew 11:29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my burden is light.

When I counsel with married couples I hear them say they are so tired.... weary and want to give up the fight. I know stress is the number one killer of the physical body but it is also a killer of marriages. If couples become too stressed and get tired of the fight they will quit.

Listen to what stress does to the body: The body automatically prepares for vigorous physical activity. It has an involuntary fight or flight response. Messages race from the hypothalamus and spread alarm to the nervous system, muscles tense, bold vessels constrict, 2 hormones are sent out from the pituitary gland to the thyroid and adrenal glands, the adrenal gland sends out 30 more hormones to nearly every organ in the body. This causes the pulse to shoot up, blood pressure to soar, stomach and intestines stop digesting, hearing and smell come more acute. Hundreds of other physical changes occur without even knowing it. (Lewis 2003)

Wow, In this scripture Jesus is not only trying to save your physical life but your marriage as well. Stop stressing and breathe, it is not work dieing for. Sometimes it is the simple things we can do to relieve our stress, like take a walk. However you find rest for your souls, remember you can lean on Jesus He is gentle and kind 24 /7.

Ref. Lewis, J.A. et al.; Community counseling (2003)

Melissa

Does God want us to be happy?

Proverbs 16:20 He who heeds the word wisely will find good, And whoever trusts in the Lord, HAPPY is he.

I recently went to celebrate a friends birthday and I gave her a card that said, "God wants you to be Happy." I was not trying to make a theological statement. It was just a cute card I found at the dollar store. Another friend who knows the word of God very well made a comment after the card was read. She said, "I do not agree that God wants us to be happy."

IF God is our loving father, why wouldn't he want us to be happy? It does not make sense. I have kids and my desire is for them to be happy. Yet as a parent, I know there will be times when my kids will be far from happy, due to the hardships in life.

During hard times we have to make the right choices. The word of God helps steer us away from what might "feel good", in the moment, i.e. make us "happy" to doing the right thing even though it is hard and will be a sacrifice to our self.

There have been many times in my marriage I was very unhappy. I wanted to quit so I could stop suffering and have "happiness." God's word seered me to continue doing the hard thing. I chose to stay in the marriage and sacrifice my "happiness". Yet when we heed to God's word and trust him we will be happy.

God's desire is for us to have the best. He does not want us to use the excuse of being happy to give up our marriage.

If we endure we will find the true riches of life that not only bring happiness but pure joy unspeakable. I am so glad I followed God. I made the hard decison to stay in my marriage. I got more that I could have dreamed.

I am blessed. I chose to be happy. I know this is God's will for me.

Mimwrite

Escalating and Forgivness

Isaiah 1:18 "Come now and let us reason together." Says the Lord, though your sins are like scarlet, They shall be white as snow; though they are red as crimson, They shall be as wool. If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land; But if you refuse and rebel, You shall be devoured by the sword; For the mouth of the Lord has spoken.

I was counseling a married couple last night and explaining about how to "fight fair". We were talking about the damage that can be done when a conversation escalates (see my page on escalation). I was helping them see all the ways they could prevent exculation.

Not 15 minutes after they left, my daughter was caught doing something, AGAIN, that she had done in the past and just gotten in trouble over. I was livid. My emotions escalated. One thing lead to another and before I knew it my whole family was starting to escalate. Who was escalating the most, yes you guessed it, the counselor, ME.

I did finally incorporate some of my "own" techniques and we ended up going to bed in a peaceful way. The point is we are all human. We are all capable of doing the wrong thing even when we should know better. When we realize this about ourselves we should firstly give ourselves grace.

Beating your self up with the "I should have's" will lead you down the path to self condemnation, guilt and shame. These feelings only lead your to destruction. First forgive yourself and then go straight to God and confess your wrong attitude and or behavior. If you do this He will forgive you. Lastly go to the one you wronged and with a soft and gentle heart ask for forgiveness.

If the problem still needs to be worked out then do it when your emotions are not flaming. Remember just because you are at a place to ask for forgiveness, you spouse may not be ready to admit their wrong. Do not admit it for them. Work to understand where they are and give them space to see how they may need to ask for forgiveness too.

Mimwrite

A Secret to forgiving your spouse after an affair

You can forgive anyone for anything. Forgiving does not mean that the offender can have full access to your life. When someone has committed an affair and is forgiven it does not mean they have full rights back into their spouses life. This post is NOT addressing trust issues or suggesting their should be no healthy boundaries put in place. These issues and an establishment that true repentance on the offender's part is real and guidelines should set up for restoration of themselves and their marriage IS NOT TO BE OVERLOOKED. Here, I am talking about matters of the heart and attitude.

After my husband did repent of his affair and we had set our healthy boundaries for safety and healing, many people did not understand how I could have forgiven him. I remember one man who sat with me at church and looking perplexed asked me, "How did you forgive him?" His implication was more a "Why" did you for give him. He was viewing our situation as my husband being the worst slim ball he had ever met. It only took me a second to respond.

God had made his point to me on this particular matter quite clear. It took a long time for God's message to fully penetrate my heart. I understood it in my head, but until something reaches your heart the full impact of the revelation will not be able to explode into your world and start to change you and your situation.

My response to this man was, given with a smile and a bit of a chuckle, "You have never lived with me, you have no idea of my sins." The man looked perplexed. Simply put I explained to the man that I too was a sinner and God has forgiven me of my sin. I do realise that an affair has much more drastic consequences on a marriage than many other sins. That was not my point. My point was a matter of the heart. My attitude of forgiveness.

I forgive because I have been forgiven. I have committed murder in my heart towards my husband. Thank God I did not act on on it.... Yet I do understand too fully how evil my heart and actions can be. My life verse is a simple one it is found in Psalms 16:2, "O my soul, you have said to the Lord, You are my Lord, MY GOODNESS IS NOTHING APART FROM YOU."

There is nothing good in me but God. If God has forgiven me, I will follow his command for me to forgive others.

Mimwrite

Waterfalls

Psalm 42:7 Deep calls unto deep at the noise of your waterfalls; All your waves and billows have gone over me. The Lord will command his lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me--A prayer to the God of my life.

Thank you for the "noise of your waterfalls". The things that are of you call me to come to you and recieve the filling and refreshing of your Spirit. I dive deep with in your waves. I desire to recieve your loving kindness all the day and sing the song of prayer to you at night.

Change: Instead of listing to the negative buzzing world and my own distracting thoughts, I want to make room to notice in awe your lovingkindness all the day towards me.

Know: When I am open to your spirit, I can recieve a seed of joy in my heart; Then my song will not be hard to find.

Mim

Psalm 40:8 I delight to do your will, O my God, And your law is within my heart.

This is a simple verse, yet in these stressful times, even the simple things can seem hard if we lose our focus. When I first typed this verse I typed, O God, I left out the important MY. He is MY God, MY daddy. He is bigger than anything going on in my life or your life. Our Abba Father desires us to delight in doing His will. We should actually have JOY in being obedient. He summed it up in two simple things, we are to love him and others.

Sometimes we have the greatest problems in loving those closest to us, our spouses, members of our church, and our family. God calls us to use our faith and step out by loving the ones who have hurt us the most.

If we are to obey him in delight, we have to have the paradigm that He will keep us safe. He will show us how to love, using healthy boundaries and Godly wisdom. Our part is to put His law in our hearts continually and follow the Holy Spirit's leading.

Mim

God is bigger that Divorce, Dissappointment or Death

I don't know whether to laugh or cry, to sleep or run a marathon. My emotions and energy are at two places at once. My spirit is ready to get back to joy and continue on my path of purpose. My flesh is still processing the death of my dad. I realize balance and perfect timing are my friends today. I have spent the last 30 days getting up early and spending time with the Lord and praying in the spirit through out the day. Five days ago life got in the way of my "spirtual routine". In reality it was death that came knocking on my door.

I found myself in my pastor's office telling him with tears in my eyes, I do not want to cry over this man anymore. He just looked at me smiled and spoke, "You being the professional counselor, know you have to grieve." I kind of laughed and said, "I know but I don't want to. You don't understand. Over my life I have cried enough tears over him for three deaths. One of those deaths was when he left me and my mom at the age of 7. But divorce is not like death, because the person is still there yet in my case not there. It is rejection pilled upon rejection everytime he did not take the time for me. The second death I grieved through therapy. I had to accept dad was never going to be the dad I so desperately needed.

LOVE was not the problem between us. We loved each other very much. It was other complications that got into the way. He had a new wife and a son. He was born in the 30's and divorced in the mid 6o's. He was on the cutting edge of that era and no books had been written about how to "do" the blended family thing. I just got left behind. It is like I spend a life time asking him to be in my life. He did not fit into my life and I did not fit into his. The chasm was too wide and the love on his part in my opinion was not strong enough. I felt like I was always the one calling him and working on our relationship. He did honor me and tell me how much he loved me. I believed him when he told me how special I was to him. I did appreciate the words. Yet words without actions fall very short .

He made me feel like I was not worth "fighting for". This theme bleed like a sickness into my life. I wanted him to fight for me. He never really did. I had to learn to accept what he was willing to give, a phone call every now and then sprinkled with sweet words that blessed me. I thought when my kids came along that would surely pull him towards us. My mom spoke to him on her death bed telling him to please be the dad I needed since she was no longer going to be here for me. NOTHING changed.

The most fantastic thing happened through all this. God found me and he became my dad. I accepted him in my bedroom at the age of 12 after reading the book called Peace with God by Billy Graham. Since then I have experienced such an intimate relationship with Jesus, Father God, and the Holy spirit. The love of God has more than made up for losing my dad.

In my thirty's my tears started to flow again in grief of my dad. It happened on a weekly basis. Here I was an adult and still crying over my dad. DIVORCE DOES HURTS THE KIDS! I was in leadership at a small yet intimate growing church. This one particular Sunday the supernatural power of God poured into our church. God personally touched me and I found myself lying at the alter crying. That may sound weird to some of you, but it was happening to most of the people there. It was not the norm, it was GOD.

As God's hand was upon me I started to cry and could not stop. It was coming from the debth of my soul. I lay there sobbing. I was clueless as to what I was crying about. In my spirit, I heard God say,"I doing spiritual surgery on you. I am bleeding all the pain and hurt you have felt from your dad. I am releasing it all from your soul." God reminded me that He, God, was my dad. He told me that He loved me and that He would never leave or forsake me. He had me remember all the times He was there for me. I don't remember how long I cried on the floor that day. God did not let go me until I had released a life time of pain, rejection and hurt. After that day with God, I NEVER felt that deep anguishing dad pain again. I was completely healed. I never cried over the loss again.

The day my dad died I was happy for him. He had Alzheimer's and was released from a 78 year old body. I knew he had asked Jesus into his heart years ago. I knew death was not the end but a new beginning. I knew he was out of pain and going to heaven to start his eternity with God and his family members who went before him.

I cried in my pastor's office due to the memory's of my wonderful dad. He was a great man and a treasure. But at his funeral I shed no tears. I felt no guilt. I just had no more tears to give and that was a good thing. I really did not go to say good by to my dad. I had done that years ago. I went to the funeral to reconnect with the family I had lost as a child. I found myself getting mad at my dad at his funeral. I saw my aunt Doris, uncles and cousins. Divorce not only stole my dad it stole a whole family from me. Even though I do not know this family very well it was funny how I loved them still. They are all so sweet and lovely in their own special way.

That brings me to the biggest blessing of all, short of God himself. My brother, Frank. Because of family junk my brother and I never got to know each other very well. I think it would please my dad very much that his son and I made a promise "to fight" for each other and make time to build a relationship with our families. Something dad could never do. This past week, I lost my dad, again, BUT I gained a brother, a sister-in -law, 2 of the cutest nephews and a precious 5 month old niece. That is a beautiful thing!

In Christ all things are made new. God can take any situation and turn it around for the good of those who love him.

I send my praises to God for he is good and his mercy endures forever.

Melissa Parker Clark
November 15th, 2010

Psalms 61: 10-12
Is it not you oh God who cast us off? And you God who did not go out with our armies? Give us help from trouble, For the help of man is useless. Through God we will do valiantly, For it is He who shall tread down our enemies.

This psalm is an urgent prayer from king David for the restored favor of God. David seems to be fighting battles against his enemy's and does not see God helping him. He seems to be wondering where God's favor is over his battles. Over the past two years I have many opportunities to feel the same way. My battle has not been with an army but with the economy, kids problems, things breaking in my home, parents dying. My dad at this very moment is at death's door.

When life gets overwhelming and disappointing, I have two choices, I can get in my row boat or my sailboat. If I chose my row boat I am in control. I am the master of my own boat as I grab the oars and in my own strength start to cut into the surface of the deep. I know this journey well. I am "doing" something. I am moving. I am surviving. I am thinking, worrying, and reacting to my situation in fear. Working diligently, my only accomplishment, is sweat running from my brow, with sorrow and disappointment as my friends.

I left no room for God to work. I jumped off on my own agenda and find myself worn out from all the work and worry. At that moment I might be like David and ask God, "Is it not you who cast me off? Why did you not go out with me to fight my army?"

I can hear God's response, "I was not consulted. There was no room for me in your rowboat. Remember my gift to you is freedom to chose...."

At this point I remember, the sailboat. God created the wind that can show me the way to understanding. He can show me the way to go and give me strength through His wind to carry me there. I can relax and have peace on the way. "Through God we will do valiantly." The base of the word valiantly in Greek is HIKANOS. It means to arrive competent (as if coming in season), ample in amount and fit in character plus content, enough, good, great, large, long (while), many, meet, much, security, sore, sufficient, and worthy. I will take my freedom of choice and chose to be valiant!

In response to the word of God I will make changes in my life today by:

Stop: Trying to do things in my own strength
Do: Walk valiantly in God's ways.
Know: God is never against me.
Change: The choices I make to go forward in my own strength.

Mimwrite

You may not understand God's requests

Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean NOT on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.

There are times I live the first sentence of this scripture backwards. It comes out like this: Trust in the Lord with all YOUR understanding and lean NOT on your own heart. God does speak to me in my heart. I do hear Him. Many times what I hear does not make logical sense, it passes my human understanding . This leads me to question, Was it really God? I have learned it does not have to make sense to me to really be God.

Here is an example. When I was living in NC God spoke to me in my spirit to go talk to my pastor about how I could help married couples who were experiencing infidelity. At the time I was not a counselor but had walked through the experience years earlier in my own marriage and knew how to over come the damage. I knew this pastor only as an acquaintance.

I made the appointment to see him. I had to take my daughter, Ashley who was two at the time. I told my pastor I knew the Lord wanted me to come and talk to him but did not know exactly why. I felt awkward as I spoke especially when he paid more attention to my daughter than to what I was saying. At the end of the appointment I tried to sum it up by saying, "Well I do not know why God wanted me to come and tell you this but if you have a couple in your church who is experiencing infidelity sent them to me. I have walked through it and know the keys to overcoming. The only time he was fully engaged with me was when he asked this question, "How can one ever establish trust once it has been broken?" I told him you have to trust God not your spouse. You have to set up healthy boundaries to allow the hurt spouse to feel safe and you have to make sure the adulteror is truly repentant and seeking professional help and has a structure of strong accountability."

Long story short God asked me to go back to see him 6 more times. I did not obey due to my pride, i.e. I thought, "He is going to think I am nuts if I keep coming back to see him." Because I relied on my own understanding, I did not trust God and did not go back to see my pastor. I dismissed it saying this must not be God if it does not make sense to me. Months later it was revealed to our church that this very pastor was having an affair. He ended up getting a divorce, lost his church, and it took years for that church to get healed of the situation.

God had picked little old me to be his spokes person. Instead of trusting God with my heart, and listening to Him, I listened to my insecure heart and leaned on my own understanding. Just think of the message that would have sent to my pastor if I had gone back 6 more times saying, "I don't know why I am here but God sent me again to tell you if you know anyone who is in an adulterous affair I can help." We will never know what impact God could have had through me in that particular situation.

In Isaiah 55:8-9 God tells us our thoughts are not His thoughts and our ways are not his ways. Let me encourage you, if you feel God is nudging you to do something, don't lean on your own understanding. Just do it. It may not be what others want you to do. It is so important to be obedient and set boundaries to enable you to do exactly what God has for you whether you understand it or not. Remember if God asks you to do something it is always in love and lines up to the words in the bible.

I am always asking myself, "I have the knowledge of the word but how do I apply it to work in my life?" I know step one is to trust Him with all our heart and lean not to my own understanding. Step two is in all your ways acknowledge him. "My ways" are the paths, the roads or the decisions I make on a daily basis. The key word is to acknowledge Him and then you will get the results of Him directing your paths. Yada is the Hebrew word for acknowledge. It can be translated into "know". The meaning is to know through observation, investigation, reflection, or firsthand experience. But the highest level of yada is in the direct intimate contact. If we are to get it right we need to know the information and the information giver.

If we want to have God direct our paths we must have direct intimate contact with Him on a daily basis. If we are too busy to be with Him, to listen to Him, to wait on Him, to get to know Him through his word or to pray to Him then we need to set up healthy boundaries so nothing steals our time with Him.

Pray about what to say yes to and what to say no to. Sometimes we get stuck into helping people because they are needy. Make sure you are doing what God wants you to do not what others expect you to do.

Suggestion for the day: Take the energy you use worrying about what others will think of you if you do not live your life trying to please them and devote that energy to pleasing God.


Mimwrite

Mim

Winning Women Information

Hello,

Welcome to my blog. I enjoyed so much getting to talk to all of you. Hope your trip home was great and you were able to get rested.

The place where we are going to write our Quiet time verses and responses is at www.groups.google.com/group/beauty4ashes-WW

I have already made you a member if you gave me your email address. If I do not have your email then email me and give it to me and I will add you as a member. As you can see the "How to have a quiet time you would not want to miss" is on my blog. Just follow the directions on that page and watch God bless you as you begin to eat his word. Remember if you want to increase your faith, then faith comes by hearing and by hearing the word of God". It is impossible to please God without faith. So I pray God will inspire you to be in the word daily. I pray He will do immeasureably more than you can ask or think! I know He will turn your ashes into beauty as you spend time in His presence.

My personal email is mimwrite@gmail.com .

If you need more help in receiving Beauth for Ashes and would like to do a 50 minute session on the phone let me know. I do ask for a 25.00 donation.

Also I told Dana about another group I had put together called tired get energy. This is a supplement I have been taking for 2 weeks and it has changed my life. I started a group for it and for people who are taking it and how it is giving them a feeling like they have drunk from the fountain of youth. So if your interested in learning more about this Supplement the address is www.groups.google.com/tired-get-energy .

Smiles,
Melissa Clark

How to Have a Quiet Time you do not want to Miss!

How to have a Quiet Time you won't want to miss!

Ask God to:
"Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in Your law"
Psalms 119:18

Thank God that:
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, and
training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be
thoroughly equipped for every good work."
2 Timothy 3:16,17

Teaching: What I need to know about God, myself and others.

Rebuking: What I need to stop believing or doing.
Correcting: What I need to change in my thought, attitudes, or actions.
Training in righteousness: What I need to do in obedience to God's

word or His prompting.

Expect all scripture to show me something that I need to know, stop, change or do.

Use a Plan:

1. Select where I will read in the Bible.
2. Read until God impresses me with my verse.
3. Write in my journal (or any notebook):
a. "My Verse"
b. Why God impressed me with "my verse".
(What does he want me to know, stop, change or do.)
4. Praise God for what He is teaching me.
5. Write "my verse" on a 3X5 card to take with me.
6. Meditate on "my verse" throughout the day.
7. Review "my verse" before bed time.

Guidelines for the above plan:

Select a book in the Bible. Begin with (a) one of the gospels such as John; or (b) one of the shorter letters such as Ephesians or James; or (c) the book of proverbs or a psalm.

Read until God impresses me with "my verse". I may need to read only a few verses.

Write in my journal (any notebook)
a. "My verse".
b. Why God impressed me with "my verse". Ask God what He wants me to know, stop, change, or do according to this verse.

Praise God for what "my verse" :
a. Reveals about Him and His character.
b. Says or promises about myself.
c. Says or promises about others: my spouse, children, parents, friends, co-workers, etc. (These can be written in my journal when there is time).

Write "my verse" on a 3X 5 card to take with me. Write it poetry-style rather than in settence form, using short phrases that will catch my eye. Underline key words or phrases God lays on my heart.

Meditate on "my verse" throughout the day. Praise God often for the truths in "my verse", using the "praise areas" in #4.

Review "my verse" just before bedtime. God can use my sleeping hours to "renew my mind". Romans 12:2.

By Lin Smith
Copyright 1996
Multiplication Ministries
PO box 1270, Vista, Ca. 92085

A Prisoner of Love

I was not expecting it, the day was normal. I was driving home after being on the road from a business trip. I found much friendship in listening to teaching tapes and the radio. Sometimes when you’re alone so much you do not realize how lonely you are. Isolation is the devil’s best friend. You can be married and have the physical aspect of someone being there and yet be lonelier than if you were really alone.

I had isolated my heart in a nice safe place. It sat in a prison cell called numb. Suddenly, the unexpected happened. The day was to be anything but normal. The note hit my ear, turning the radio up; the words started permeating my mind. It was not raining outside but, in my heart, I felt I needed windshield wipers. My heart burst, my soul mourned, Rod Stewart’s words rocked my desires. Beautiful words any wife should be able to sing to her husband. “Not me… not me”, I thought as I almost ran off the road. It was everything I wanted to sing but all the words would have been a lie! My heart, no longer numb, throbbed in pain as a reminder of what was NOT.

I sang the words. Yes I did! Not to Mark but to the only one deserving my heart, Jesus.

HAVE I TOLD YOU LATELY
(Van Morrison)

Have I told you lately that I love you
Have I told you there's no one else above you
Fill my heart with gladness take away all my sadness ease my troubles that's what you do
For the morning sun in all it's glory greets the day with hope and comfort too
You fill my life with laughter and somehow you make it better ease my troubles that's what you do
There's a love that's divine and it's yours and it's mine like the sun
And at the end of the day we should give thanks and pray to the one, to the one

Usually two “suddenly’s” do not come in one day, let alone, during one song. The normality of the day was eaten up with a divine plan. “Sing it to Mark”, was the whisper I heard. “What? Lord you and maybe my mom are the only ones who come close to filling my life with love”, I replied.

My thoughts hammered out, “Mark has filled my heart with sadness. I do not know gladness. He had not eased my troubles but instead heaped them on me. He helped me trade my laughter for tears and fears. You want me to sing it to him, to Mark, my husband?”

I knew it to be so. “Sing it in faith”. I knew what Jesus was saying. “Well that would be a down and out blatant lie”, was my response. Then he reminded me of the scripture I knew by heart, Hebrews 11:1, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see”.

I went to the store and bought the tape. I memorized the words and was ready for obedience. I will never forget the night I sang it. My thoughts kept saying you’re lying, you do not mean a word of this. This is false, fake, and acted out. These were the words of the isolator. My God said, “Sing it.”

After dinner, I turned the song on. I made it fairly loud cause I can not sing a lick or carry a tune. Mark was sitting in the pink chair, his full attention was on me. “Have I told you lately that I love you? Have I told you there is no one else above you, fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness, ease my troubles that is what you do.”

I finished my song. It was hard to sing because everything in me wanted the words to be true. They were not and nothing changed. No fire works happened. He did not say he loved me too. I really do not remember what happened. It was that uneventful, so it seemed in the moment. BUT GOD was working. He is always working for you and for me.

I did not see the results the next day or the next week. Over a period of time, I could not tell you how long, because the length is not what is important. I am sure you would argue with me if you’re in pain, I do understand. What matters are results. I remember exactly when I got mine.

Mark and I were doing very well. We were celebrating our wedding anniversary in Lynchburg, Va. We were bubbled up in a hot Jacuzzi, outside, all alone. God stepped in through a speaker that I know was wired straight from heaven. It was Rod again. Singing the same song I sung in obedience and faith some time before. But this time I was not doing the singing, MARK WAS! He looked me in the eyes and sang every word. He was sincere. It was a miracle. “Have I told you lately that I love you?”

My heart broke open and I cried tears of joy. My head was spinning, firstly with my lover’s words, and secondly I was over whelmed how God had set the stage as only he can. “And at the end of the day we should pray and give thanks to the one to the one…”.

Remember God’s hand is NOT too short to save…your marriage.

In the middle of your circumstances walking in faithful love can seem uneventful, even dreadful. But we have to remember, God is always at work. I encourage you, “Do not tie God’s hands through unbelief or disobedience. There will be a day heaven will break open and you will see the working of your faith in a faithful God.”

Remembering Love is a Decision,
Mim

The Second Letter, The Mystery of Faith

In my first letter of faith dated 1996, I explained how God had promised me a child. I stated faith was the substance of things hoped for but not seen yet. I wrote, "I am sharing this with you for no reason than to prove once again God is a personal God and He does what He promises!

One year later, my life, and my circumstances were turned upside down, but my faith stood solid. Hebrews 11:1 Now FAITH is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things (we) hope for, being the proof of things (we) do not see and the conviction of their reality (faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses).

Read on, this is a long one but I think it will keep your attention. I share my testimony with you as a means to give you HOPE. Remember the word of God gives you faith.


Dearest of friends and family, March 12th, 1997


I actually wrote the first draft of this letter February, 16th, it was good but not perfect (not that I think this one is perfect). As I grow older I am more of a perfectionist. My only problem is I do not have the talents I need to convey my heart to others in writing. It would also help if I could spell. Thank God for spell check.

In the last four months, I have had some major events happen in my life. I wanted to share them with you because I know you care about me. But more importantly I wanted to share them with you because I want to testify how God has been real, powerful, and personal in my life. The last time I wrote you was in my 96' New Years Letter. In that letter I shared that God is still the God of miracles. I became vulnerable and shared, God had promised me a baby (Mark and I had tried for 4 years to get pregnant, well Mark did not try to get pregnant... that really would have been a miracle!) I shared because I wanted to give you a true example of how God requires his people to walk in faith. I wanted you to see through my life how God works in the lives of those who are faithful and believe His promises.

I do apologize to those, I have not contacted. I know this letter will come as a shock. I have been trying to think of a way to break the news... it has just been very hard.

Now that I have you on edge, bare with me a little longer. I was trying to come up with a word picture that would explain my perception of life's journey. My talents fell short so I asked for help. My neighbor and wonderful friend Thomasina captured my perception as only a true pro can (I have to give her some plugs cause she is not getting paid). Here is how she put it:

We are like caterpillars searching for food in which to thrive. Some caterpillars slink along every passing twig eating up everything in sight. They do it because it is easily attained, appealing to the eye, and tasty to the mouth. Others choose a stringent diet eating only those things which are good for the heart , soul and mind. Both kinds of caterpillars reach the inevitable moment when they must build a cocoon where major changes take place. A caterpillar whose cocoon is make out of imitation silk will be destroyed because the protective covering was only made of earthly desires and wishes. However the caterpillar who made his cocoon with the heart of God in mind will withstand the storms of life because it has been made with the perfect silk only the Lord Jesus can provide. This caterpillar will safely grow in humility, patience, and a wholesome love as God transposes him. God will then, set him free as the butterfly He designed all of us to become. The problem? Only a few of us chose God's perfect design.


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We have eaten our share of "junk leaves and twigs". I guess for some of us the question is how do "WE" start eating the kind of food that will build the kinds of cocoons that will protect us from the storms of life. We want to be all God has created us to be. Based on my life's experiences and God's truths I have my theory. "We" can do nothing but respond positively to what God is trying to do. Most of the time we are so hard headed, that God will use something major to get our attention.

This has been true in my life. The true treasures of God seem to come when I am going through storms and crisis. Through the devastation, when my strength is gone and my resources zapped then God steps in. He pulls out the junk one piece at a time...oh it hurts, I cry for relief! I bury my face in His chest. I do not tell Him to stop because I know He knows what He is doing. Every now and then when He pulls out a real "special" piece of junk. I grab it. I hold it tightly. Sometimes for long periods of time. I let go when it starts to rot a hole in my stomach. Only then
do I loosen my grip.

God will use crisis in our lives to rid us of the junk that ruins our lives. These crisis breakup every part of our world we have so nicely put together for ourselves. During these times we can chose how to respond. We can respond as if we were the center of the universe. Looking to God from our perspective we would ask questions and make statements such as: What have I done to deserve this? Where are you God? If you were a good God then you could never let something like this happen to me. Hear my cry, and listen to what I want you to do. You obviously do not know what you're doing. You do not really love me. I am never going to trust you again! You had your chance and you blew it. Move, cause I am taking over. You are not real anyway. When you die you're dead, so I'm going to eat drink and be merry! I am in control of my own destiny.

You might have a somewhat softer tone: God, I am tired and you're not moving fast enough. I deserve relief now. I just can not make it any more. I have tried to follow you but it is just too painful. I do not see any light at the end of my tunnel. Sorry God but I am catching the next train out of here.

You could chose to understand your crisis from God's perspective. Many of the psalms show His perspective. When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which You have set into place... Remembering God as our creator is a step in the right direction. Knowing you can take refuge in Him and He is your shield. Oh Lord my God, I take refuge in you; save and deliver me from all who pursue me. My shield is God most High, who saves the upright in heart. The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed a strong hold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.

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I certainly could have thought God had forsaken me when on December 5th, 1996 my husband called me to tell me he was leaving me for another woman. Hanging on the phone all I could do is listen in unbelief. He said, "Melissa I have been having an affair. I am with her now. She is pregnant with my baby. I love her more than I love you. I will not be coming home tonight. "
At that moment my cocoon could have ruptured, I lived the Psalm 6:6,7 written by King David. "I am worn out for groaning all night long I flood my bed with weeping and drench my couch with tears. My eyes grow weak with sorrow; they fail because of all my foes.

That was not the end of my sorrow. Shortly after Christmas my missionary friend called to tell me one of the orphan children (Mark and I had spend lots of time with these kids) was killed in an automobile accident. I went to Mexico to support my friends and say good bye to Daniel who was only 14 years old.

When I came home, I found out the contemporary Christian radio station, that ministered to me constantly, was being sold. This sounds like a stupid thing to get upset over but the encouragement of the station helped me make it through each day. Yet God has put something in my life that is even better.

Through all these months, my major manufacturer, who I get about 90% of my income has changed all the sales reps contracts 3 times. The final contract said they were going to pay me 1/2 my regular commissions and expected me to work twice as hard. Last week they decided to fire me. I can really relate to what Paul says in 2nd Corinthians, "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not destroyed." I am broken and filled with sorrow. Much to my surprise on the hardest journey of my entire life I am strong. Yet not I but Christ in me.

Many have committed suicide for less. That could have been my destiny if I had made my cocoon out of imitation silk. I did not! As powerfully as things and people have been ripped out of my life even more powerfully has God spoken to me and moved on my behalf. I truly have a peace that passes all understanding (that's one of His gifts). Quite often I truly become puzzled at myself. My life is crazy yet I am experiencing this "peace" and sometimes joy. Then I remember... it is Him! HE IS REAL.

If you want to hear what God has done and is doing in my life call me. If I tried t write it down I could fill up 10 more pages. I am very happy and excited about where he is going to take me. I have found when I depend on Him He is faithful.

I invite you to watch my life. Watch Him work. This is faith: "The substance of things hoped for but not seen yet, Hebrews 11:1."

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I am going to have a ministry, what I have always wanted. I am going to have a Great Godly husband and a child. When it all comes to pass everyone will have to know GOD did it. He rewards those who diligently seek Him. When He is your best friend you do not have to worry! This does not mean life is always easy but it is a lot easier with Him than it is without Him.

Thank you so much for your prayers, calls, visits (Lisa Smiley) and letters, God has really used you to encourage me. We are not made to stand alone in our storms. Thank you for not forgetting about me. Keep praying for me. I need it.

Remember God will never leave you or forsake you. I am living proof of that.

God bless you,

Melissa


Now in 2007, God had full filled all he said, except I have two kids rather than one. God can do immeasurably more than you can ask or think. That promise is for you too!

Many people want to know what happen to the other lady's baby. It was aborted due to medical complications.

Divorce, Is that my Answer?

When betrayal strikes it stings to the core. Each "case" is uniquely different. When "my case" was up in the court of my mind, I thought I was the judge. It was my marriage on trial. I was the one abused. I needed to be calling the shots, right?

After 9 years of lying, cheating and one last phone call of, "I am not coming home tonight, because I am in love with another woman and she is having my baby", was enough evidence for murder, but I was willing to settle for DIVORCE!

It was the ultimate betrayal. I had been trying to get pregnant for 4 years. Satan knows how to pull the deadly punches. Has he socked you right between your eyes? I do understand, I have had my heart ripped out too. Satan is a ruthless foe. He has come to kill, steal and destroy families! Are your going to let him have yours?

You have a choice to make. You can continue being the judge and make your own decisions based on your circumstances and how you feel. May I ask you a question about that? How has that strategy been working for you? Has it helped get you to where you are today?

Did you know, biblically speaking, that "we do not fight against flesh and blood but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms"( Ephesians 6:12 niv). If we could talk I am sure you could share about all the baggage your husband carry's on his back. I know you have good, and valid, reasons as to why there is no way to put humpty dumpty back together again. Nine years ago I would have said the same thing. Nine years ago I did say the same thing, now that I think about it.

I did something that changed everything. I stepped down from the judgement plate, cause I am a sinner too. I allowed God to take his place as judge, Jesus became my lawyer, and the Holy Spirit became my comforter and guide.

I did separate from my husband. It was the right thing to do. I did want to divorce him but...
I allowed God to move. I listened and obeyed. He told me to leave a crack in the door so a little light could come through into my marriage. I told him I wanted to dead bolt the door, nail and glue it shut. God kept whispering, just a little crack.

Through that little crack God came in and slowly healed me and changed all the circumstances. It was painful. It was miraculous. He was victorious! Our marriage was saved.

I know you are saying, "That is your story, not mine". Remember we have one common denominator, God the Creator of the universe. Do you think it is an accident you are at my blog reading this? NO! God knew you would be here and he placed me in your path to help you and remind you: God can do immeasurably more than you can ask or think, Ephesians 3:20.

Follow God, He will led the way. If you do not know how, just ask Him to show you and He will. He got you here didn't He?

Mim

The First Letter: A Testimony of Faith

Revelation 12:11

They overcame him (Satan) by the blood of the Lamb

and by the word of their testimony

At Christmas we send cards to our family and friends wishing them the peace and joy of the season. Over the years many have taken it a step further by adding a short testimony of their family news. In 1996, my Christmas letter was late so it ended up becoming a "New Years" Letter. It was a letter inspired by God. It was a testimony not of our family at present, ie. just me an Mark. It was a letter telling of my family to be. It was a prophetic testimony of the future. When God shared His promise with me he instructed me to share it with 100 of my friends. God was up to something and all I could do was believe, trust and obey. This came after the "bath tub" scene from an earlier blog.

My letter:

God Bless and Keep You in 1996

Dearest Friends and Family,

Mark and I wanted to take the chance to thank you for all your love, Christmas cards, and birthday/Christmas gifts. Yes, I am now 35 and Mark is still 34 till May 31st, 1996. I have to live with older woman jokes till then. It is an annual thing.

We feel so blessed to have you as family and friends. I always use to hate to write letters because all you can do is talk about yourself, ask questions that won't get answered. I did until my wise Aunt Betty told me her story. She would write her mother Grace, letters. Grace, my grandmother, would tell her she treasured getting letters because she would read them over and over again.

Do not fret, I do not expect you to read this letter again and again. I will just be pleased if you finish it! And thrilled if you write back. Now that I have gotten this far and said absolutely nothing, I can't think of a thing to say, pause for a rare moment! It won't last long.

The real reason I am writing this letter is to honor God. I want to tell you what He did for me one day. As most of you know Mark and I have been trying to have a baby. Many times over the last three years I have looked to God for some kind of confirmation, promise or sign, to affirm me He was going to allow me to have a child. For three years He has said nothing. I knew I had no guarantee. Life is just that way sometimes. Things happen or don't happen and you just do not understand why. Over these three years I have truly trusted God with my life, children or no children. If no children then I knew He had something uique for Mark and me.

I had real peace with this baby issue. I still do but now I have a promise! God has finally promised me a child. I can't explain in this letter how He told and touched me. The fact is He did! He is a personal God and if we will sit still long enough to listen to His still soft voice I can't even dream of how much more abundant our lives would be. Don't you agree? Maybe you could get back to me on this question...

Faith is the substance of things hoped for but not seen yet. I am sharing this with you for no reason than to prove once again God is a personal God. He does what He promises! There is no sign of a child in my body. Yet God has made his promise and I believe HIm. Mark and I have learned to trust God and He has always been faithful, ALWAYS.

I know what you are thinking. Poor Melissa what if she does not have a baby. She will feel all kinds of pressure. Let me put your mind to rest. God made the promise!

The scripture God has put on my heart is Romans 12:12. We can as Christians be always joyful in hope. We should have the strength to be patient in affliction because we know God's faithfulness! And last but not least we should be faithful in prayer. Please pray for us this year and we promise to pray for you also. God bless you!

Melissa and Mark

In His steps we can...

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Romans 12:12

---------------

A year later I wrote another letter to the same 100 people, my earthly circumstances had changed quite a bit. Read letter two, as Paul Harvey would say, for the "rest of the story".

If this letter is a little over the top for you with me "hearing from God" please refer to my reference page for instruction ideas for learning more.

Suggested Resources for equipping you with success in the battle for your marriage

Resources that helped me fight for my marriage.

If you want to learn how to have God's power in your life and learn how to hear his voice more clearly I strongly suggest you get:

Experiencing God: Knowing and Doing the Will of God
The Workbook
By Henry T. Blackaby & Claude V. King

When God Speaks: How to Recognize God's Voice and Respond in Obedience
The Work book
By Henry Blackaby & Richard Blackaby



Great Devotionals:

Streams in the Desert, (An Updated Edition In Today's Language)
By L.B. Cowman, edited by James Reimann

Smith Wigglesworth Devotional, "God is more eager to answer than we are to ask." Smith Wigglesworth
*Whitaker House

My Utmost for His Highest (An Updated Edition in Today's Language)
Oswald Chambers

Books
The Bible By God
The Five Love Languages, By Dr. Gary Chapman
The Five Languages of Apology, By Dr. Jennifer Thomas and Dr. Gary Chapman
Fighting for Your Marriage, By Howard Markman, Scott Stanley, Susan Blumberg
Boundaries in Marriage, By Dr. Henry Cloud, Dr. John Townsend
The Language of Love, By Smalley and Trent
The Journey to Wholeness in Christ, By Signa Bodishbaugh
Divorce Busting, By Michelle Warner Davis
Heart To Heart about Men, By Nancy Groom


Books that teach more about Prayer

The Power of a Praying Wife, By Stormie Omartian
Prayers That Avail Much, Word Ministries
The Master Is Calling
"Discovering the Wonders of Spirit Led Prayer," By Lynne Hammond
the practice of the presence OF GOD, By Brother Lawrence

Please let me know any resources that has helped you fight for your marriage.

In His Power
Mim

The Bath Tub Scene, Chapter three

Cleaning the Tub

As I was cleaning the bath tub, I told you I would get back to the bath tub scene, I heard the Lord Jesus speak to my heart. He told me that Mark had an affair. He said he wanted to heal our marriage. He said he could not heal it unless the “sin” was brought into the light and dealt with.
(1st John 1:60) Sin blocks us from receiving what God wants to give us.

Jesus told me to completely forgive Mark and to trust God to heal our marriage. So I got off my knees and went around the corner where Mark was laying on the bed. I told him what God had just said to me. “Mark, God just spoke to my heart and said you have had an affair on me. I just want you to know he said he wants to heal our marriage. In order for him to do this the darkness must come into the light. He also told me to forgive you.”

As you can quite imagine, Mark was somewhat stunned. He immediately denied this fact, as anyone in his shocked shoes would. I persisted.

Mark, it is ok I forgive you, anyone can make a mistake. God just wants to heal our marriage and said you must bring the darkness into the light and tell of the affair so it is hidden no more. This is the only way God can start working in our marriage. I promise you, I forgive you and I love you.

A miracle was born. It was not the miracle of God speaking to me. It was not the miracle of me believing God spoke or me being able to trust God and forgive Mark. It was the miracle of Mark’s willingness to confess his sin in front of His God. He confessed his sin to his bride of less than one year, knowing it would tear her heart out. And it did.

Mark knew God had given me revelation knowledge about the affair. He knew I had no way of knowing and no clue of his unfaithfulness. I personally believe it took more faith on his part to trust God, for healing and trust me for forgiveness than for me to initially forgive him.

I remember asking Mark if he loved me. He told me he was not sure if he loved anyone. “Great, I’m thinking, why did you marry me? He does not know if he loves me or anyone? Who is this guy and where is the man I married?” Those were reasonable questions. We split for the weekend. I ran home to my mom and he ran to the mountains to seek God.



Baby Steps

When the pain of life gets hard where do you run? Our marriage was in its infancy yet it was already a pressure cooker. Mark let off some steam in a one night stand. Through the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit, I had confidence and abilities beyond myself to believe, confront and forgive him.

Our marriages will not be saved without the Supernatural Power of the Holy Spirit. I just down loaded a mind reading device. I know what you’re thinking, “Well God has never talked to me while cleaning the tub. You must have a special gift cause God does not talk to me like that.”

God promises if you seek his kingdom everything you need will be added unto you. He does not have favorites, we are all his favorites. It took faith for me to believe it was God telling me about Mark’s affair. I have been learning to listen to God for years. I stared out taking baby steps of faith. Try it! Remember, if you miss Him, and you will… not to worry, He’ll throw you another pitch till your hitting home runs.

Remember this, without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.
Take these baby steps:
First read the faith chapter, Hebrews 11. Then order Joyce Meyers tape, How to get baptized in the Holy Spirit. For fun get the DVD “What About Bob”. See how taking baby steps changed his life and remember to laugh.
Giant Step: Buy Henry Blackaby's Bible Study called Expeiencing God. This will teach you, biblically, how to have a vibrant real and powerful relationship with God. You need all He has for you, to be victorous, in the battle for your marriage.

Passionate about "Till Death do we Part"

“Seek the kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” Mathew 6:33-34 NLT

I am sure my Mom felt the “trouble of the day” when the service station attendant told her my Dad was having an affair with the new neighbor. Mom was on her way to meet this lady. My Dad beat her to the punch that changed our lives forever.

I was an only child with a creative imagination. Mom heard me speaking to a beautiful flower one day, “God, I know you’re in there, you better come out and play with me!” Over the years, God became much more than a playmate.

Life was new and exciting I had just been cast into the lead role of my first grade play. My team and I had clogged our way into the Championship title in front of 1000 people. I rode my purple bike with passion as the wind hit my worry free face, till the day of trouble came too soon in my sweet innocent life.

I went from an only child to a lonely child when my Mom moved our trailer and 66 Chevy to a new town. It was her and me against the world.

Dad stopped coming around because he could not bear the guilt. The pain pierced both our hearts into the depths of our soul. Dad started over with a new marriage. In his eyes I knew he too never got over the loss. Divorce never stops hurting.

In my 30’s, I found a new day of trouble. One year into my marriage, while cleaning my bathtub the Holy Spirit revealed to me, (check my blog for the rest of that story…) the man of my dreams had tasted the forbidden fruit. I was unable to keep my dad from being stolen from me as a child but as an adult I did have the power to fight for my husband.

I had a secret weapon. At twelve I had received Jesus as my personal lord and savior. God had become my dad. When I used the power of His love, His word, and the supernatural guidance of the Holy Spirit I gained powerful VICTORIES.

I said,” Till death do we part” and I meant it! Trust me, there were times in the first 10 years I wanted death instead…his not mine. Personally experiencing divorces’ devastation and destruction from many different facets fueled my passion for women experiencing broken marriages. It drove me to get my masters in counseling. I desired to be better equipped to help women find the path to courage, hope and healing.

We live in a radical world where adultery, fornication and divorce grow rapid. To fight this I believe Christians must be even more radical using principles of radical love, forgiveness, long suffering, and obedience found in the Bible. My passion is to empower and equip women for the battle to save their marriages, which saves families, thus saving individual lives.

I have started a “Heart to Heart” ministry at East Coast Believers Church in Casselberry, Fl. Heart to Heart’s mission is to meet the emotional, spiritual and material needs of women who are physically, emotionally or spiritually separated from their spouse.

I am starting a blog where I desire to impart wisdom through excerpts of the book I am writing, “Intimacy through Fire.” This blog invites women to come incognito to share and find resources, encouragement and counsel for their particular situation.

I am a living testimony of seeking God first. He has given me the desires of my heart. Mark and I came through victoriously. I know others can too! We just celebrated 17 years of marriage with our 2 children.

From my heart to yours, H2H
Melissa Clark
Blog address:
Email: mimwrite@gmail.com
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